Story Submission by Alex, Age 21
When I was 13 I first started to get mild depression, I didn’t think too much of it just a ‘teenage thing’. I got to about 15 and it was still around but was getting worse, by about 16 it got to the point where I just started to cry, but for no apparent reason. Just because I felt so alone and worthless. I never told anyone about it… After about 8 months of that, it stopped for a good 2ish years without any help.
After I turned 18 I started to get in a pretty rough rut. The Depression came back and since I had my license, the only thing I could do to calm myself down, was go for a drive. I had an AW11 MR2 as my L’s and P plate car, I enjoyed going for drives to no where so much. It got more frequent and I eventually told someone. I declined any help that was advised and didn’t do anything about it.
I attempted to commit suicide three times after that between then and turning 20.
My friend somehow found out the first time and ran to my house (a good 2kms away) and got me before I went too far and my older sister found out the 2nd time and stopped me just before I was going to slam my car into a pole.
She insisted I get help to which I agreed on, I ended up getting tests done to show that I had/have clinical depression and not just teenage blues as my parents thought. I went through 2 years of counselling and meds.
I’m not on meds or seeing a counsellor anymore, I now have a girlfriend who loves me very much who I am thankful of, a sister who looks out for me all the time and a worked Sil80 (180sx) that I love working on and taking to the track. Everything is never as bad as you think, I always had friends and family who loved me but I could never see it past the depression and thought I literally had one of the worst lives. There are people who care about you, never think differently for a second.